A few months back, I posted this. I never gave my reasons for not wanting to get pregnant, I just stated that I didn't want to and proceeded to rant about how doctors won't do it....You're fully capable of reading it, so I'm not going to repeat everything I said in the post, but I am going to tell you two main reasons why I chose the "no pregnancy" route and then I'm going to share some new information.
Reason 1: I have Type I diabetes. Not only is it difficult to conceive, but your chances of miscarriage are higher. Also, there is a greater risk of the baby getting diabetes and developing birth defects if a diabetic mother is not careful and allows her "numbers" to get too high. I don't want to be the reason my child ends up with what I have.
Reason 2: I have Poly-Cystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS). Pretty much, my hormones are all out of whack. Like with diabetes it is more difficult to conceive and the chances of miscarriage are higher. I don't handle death well, so I can't imagine how I would respond if I had multiple miscarriages.
With my mind made up that I don't want to give birth to children, I decided to see a doctor about my options. I wanted to know as much as I could before I made the final decision to put an end to any possibility of pregnancy. The first thing she said to me was that women of my "demographic" later regret it. Let me rephrase: she said that 90% of those women end up regretting it. She also told me that there are few doctors that would perform the procedure because of my age, the fact that I've never had a child and the fact that I'm still single. Oh yeah, she also said that out of the women that regret it and end up getting the $10,000, money up-front, reversal procedure, only 50% of them end up pregnant. She commended me on thinking it through thoroughly and still being open to adoption, but she also believed that I was making a choice out of fear. Was she right?? Absolutely. I can't deny when someone hits it right on the head. Even now, looking back at my reasons....it's all fear. I fear I'll pass down what I have. I fear miscarriages. I fear the disappointment of that single pink line, over and over. My reasons, no matter how thought out they are, are based in fear.
She also told me that she specializes in high-risk pregnancy (which is what I would be considered) and she said that with the technology and doctors out there, it is VERY possible for a woman with Diabetes and PCOS to have very healthy children. She said it would require a lot of self discipline and monitoring, but it's possible. She doesn't believe that fear should be a factor. At the end of our conversation, she gave me information on different options and ended it with a "I can't tell you what decision to make, I can only give you the facts and options. From there you have to make the decision for yourself."
My appointment got me thinking: Knowing what I now know, if I removed the fear from my "reasons," would I still feel the same way or would I be open to the option of eventually becoming pregnant? It's a good thing I'm still single, because I have a lot to think about....
No comments:
Post a Comment